To the moon and never comeback

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you need to understand that i'm damaged.i get triggered easily. i have struggled with things. There are nights when i'm curled up on a ball on the floor and  i won't talk to anyone. i 'll shut you out. i'm not going to be able to trust you for a while , because everyone has always left, cheated or chosen someone else. i wil need you to care when i text you saying i'm getting bad again. i'm a lot , i know this..

so before you think i'm always happy that i 'll always positive ..that i 'll always be smilling  . know that reality before you get involved. i always get saddest around new year because i realize nothing has changed and it has just been a new year with the same pain from last..and the reality is .. some things hurt us more than we expect them to .. some matter take longer for us to get over .. some situations pull us down more than we had envisioned them to..

and i wish you would just tell me how you feel instead of me trying to figure it out because i don't know what to think when one night we're talking until 3am and the next night you're ignoring my calls. i don't know what to think when one day you tell me everything will be alright and i'll be okey and the next day you tell me to leave you alone.. i dont know what to think when you tell me you 'll always be here for me but when i need you .. you disappear i dont know what to think when it comes to you because one minute you're here and the next minute you're gone...

the fact that my absence doesnt bother you even the slightest makes me sad to wonder if my presence ever mattered at all in the first place..

you know what you deserve? you deserve so much better . so many thing have happened to you whether its a bad break up ,family issues,friends , whatever it is .. you pulled through.. you have made it this far and i'm proud of you ..you truly deserve the world and since no one can give you that now ..find someone that will, apologize, forgive but don't forget, find new friends.. ones that make plan with you and free their time to give you attention. you deserve all good things because you remind me of the moon.. you hide away but always come back even more shinning then before..and i'll not forget you and pray for your best in your life ..



XOXO
(honeystar)

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